Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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