you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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