Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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