im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
