READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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