I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
