I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
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