i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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