i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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