Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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