I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize