omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
