I don't usually arrange sex via text message
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
