i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
NoShamevember. You game?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Randomize
