got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
