rhymes with "ouble enetration"
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
