Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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