One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
