Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
These tits shall not be calmed
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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