I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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