You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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