My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Randomize
