i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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