oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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