Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize