well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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