I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i would punch a child for taco bell
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
