i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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