It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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