I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You were trust falling into bushes
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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