it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
