Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize