I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize