it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
