So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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