My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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