so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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