**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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