yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
