My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
