That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
