alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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