maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize