I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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