Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
