I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
