you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
