The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I cannot find my penis.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
