My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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