Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
