She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize