Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
