This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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